Luncheon Retreat

Breaking out of my shell is such a wonderful feeling. A poor self-image is difficult enough for me to battle. Add to it a paralyzing fear of other’s judgment and a need to be liked, and it is no surprise that I often find myself wondering if my public persona is a mask. Or I suppose, identifying which mask it is. I don’t think that, fundamentally, there is anything wrong with sharing different aspects of my personality at varying levels depending on the social context… but I tire of having to, correction – feeling like I have to – analyze, analyze, analyze everyone around me so that I know which mask to wear.

Aaron has such a unilateral, direct approach that is enviably WYSIWYG. Although I often think that he has rather too little regard for context and setting, I do envy that ballsy approach. Together we make a great pair: I get him to think before speaking; he gets me to speak without thinking.

Today I rediscovered how liberating and wonderful it is to be myself, kicking off heels to jump through brush, discussing plans to make a hammock retreat in the trails behind work, sharing those stories and philosophies that I often hide... finding not distrust, apprehension, or misunderstanding, but a reflection.