Rain on a Sunny Day

In order to make lemonade, one must have lemons. Luckily, they are on sale.

My father-in-law, Earl... what to say? The details of his deteriorating health are just that, details. I don't wish to be drowned by them, but the flood is difficult to avoid. No, what is important at the moment is the washed out gully that is left behind, this feeling of stark helplessness and sadness. But it seems that every bend in the road throws another obstacle, another chasm, another terrifying unknown.

A call late Friday evening, leaving you with more questions and fears and guilt. Should we have packed a quick bag to arrive home at 3:00 am? Supposed to work an extra shift Saturday, today... money, money, money... is it an excuse not to face what is in Missouri? A way to avoid not feeling helpless and useless?

And just now a call from Laura-Mom. Earl won't be released from the hospital today like they had initially promised. Such volumes spoken in the intakes of each breath like her voice was broken into. Everyone trying to protect everyone else, causing more worry than alleviating. As if the unknown is less frightening than the truth. This last call finally the catalyst to convince Aaron. A few items thrown into a bag, have only to wait for Aaron to get home from this extra shift so that we can begin the 7.5 hour drive. I don't care that we will only have a few waking hours there; I'd carry Aaron forcibly if need be.

What do I choose to see in life today? So many problems, so many lives in turmoil. I have no choice but to throw my hands up and surrender... the trick is choosing what I surrender to.